short & horrific

Title - Welcome to Nothing
Author - shorthorror
Pairing - Jimmy Sullivan / Matt Sanders
Rating - NC-17
Summary - Jimmy Sullivan has never found so much in so little. His struggles become someone else's struggles after an unexpected run-in. Now Jimmy doesn't have to suffer by himself.
Disclaimer - Purely fictional. The words are mine but the names are not.
Warning - Language, sex and mature situations.
A/n - The prologue I posted for this story was written in 3rd person, but the rest of the story is in Jimmy's POV. Just wanted to clear that up.

Prologue




"Hey buddy, are you alright?"

I woke up indoors with a blanket around my body, hearing voices I had never heard before. One of them was right up close to my face and when I opened my eyes I saw a person staring right back at me. I jumped a little and clutched the blanket close to me in fear.

"Who the fuck are you?" I asked.

"Relax dude, you're okay." Said the man.

I looked around the room and saw a computer with it's monitor asleep and displaying a lime green marquee that I couldn't read from my distance. There was a television on across the room that explained the voices I'd heard and a couple of closed doors. The floors were nothing but barren gray stone with a single rug thrown in the center of the room that cushioned a coffee table. There were stairs leading upwards that I could see behind the person that had woken me up. From what I gathered waking up and taking a brief look around I was taken into someone's basement last night after I'd gotten beat up.

"Who are you?" I asked, in need of some answers for the hundreds of questions that wanted to burst forth from my mouth.

"I'm Matt," said the hazel-eyed man. "I found you last night."

He smiled a dimpled smile that dilapidated after he noticed I wasn't returning his friendly expression. "I mean, I didn't find you, I saved you from those gangsters."

"Gangsters? Gangsters attacked me last night?" I asked, rubbing the side of my head that was pounding.

"Yeah, I watched them go after you in that alley and followed them. You're lucky I saw or else you would have been dead." Said the large man.

Matt stood up and smoothed out the front of his black hoodie. I was glad it had been him that saw me of all people and decided to intervene. He was tall and well built with broad shoulders, thick arms and strong looking legs. His full lips dipped down at the corners like he was frowning and unless it wasn't for his soft hazel eyes I would have suspected he was a complete asshole just by the way he stared. He looked like he had battled many battles in his years and the cruel toll that life inevitably took had already spread it's way over him. But by some divine force he was there when I was being attacked and for some reason he cared. At least enough to help me out and take my unconscious body somewhere where it couldn't be abused any further. I remembered smudges from the night before and dropping my backpack. I gasped as I recalled searching around blindly on the cement for my backpack while being kicked in the ribs over and over.

"My backpack, where is it?" I asked, feeling the wave of panic crash over me. I pleaded silently with God or Buddha or whatever higher power existed that the gangsters that had dropped me didn't take my backpack with my clothes and my mp3 player.

"Oh, One sec." Matt said as he turned and opened a door to a closet. He pulled out my backpack and I felt the most uplifting sense of relief I had ever felt in my life. They hadn't taken my backpack. Matt crossed the room and dropped it in front of the couch. I pulled the blanket off of my legs and lifted it up, grimacing when the smell of the alleyway drifted off of it. The shell of my backpack was still damp and when I looked inside after unzipping it I discovered that all my stuff was still there and intact.

"So what were you doing in that alley anyway? Don't you know it's dangerous to walk around them at night?" Asked Matt.

"No, I... I didn't know that actually." I said, feeling a little more than dumb as I picked at my nail.

"What are you, new in town?" Matt asked, flashing me another dimpled grin.

"I'm not new. I just... haven't been downtown much." I admitted.

"Well it's not a good idea. You don't just go walking through alleys at night. Someone always gets hurt or runs into trouble." Matt admonished, shaking his head with an air of disappointment.

"Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking. But thanks. Like really, thanks a lot. You probably saved my life man." I said.

"It's alright. Don't worry about it." He dismissed.

I grinned to myself. I thought I had met my end last night in that alley and when I looked up at the man who helped me narrowly escape death I felt the deepest feeling of gratitude and happiness. I only wished I was able to repay him somehow. I would have loved to but the voice beneath my surface told me there was no way, I just wasn't in the position to be giving.

"So, uh, what's your name?" He asked me.

"Jimmy. Jimmy Sullivan." I answered.

"Well Jimmy, I would love to have you stay here and get some more rest but we have to leave. This isn't really my house." Matt said.

"Oh, who's house is it?" I asked.

"My buddy's. He doesn't know I'm here right now, so...-"

"It's okay. I'll leave now I guess." Said I as I pulled my backpack up onto my sore shoulders.

"Well if you got nothing important to do then why don't you come get some coffee with me?" He asked.

I looked around the room one last time before nodding. He was sadly right about me not having anything important to do so I figured I might as well go along with him, since he had saved my life and brought me to his friend's place without even asking. I followed him up the stairs and we came to a closed door with a shoe rack beside it. There were something like fifteen different pairs all piled up on top of each other. Matt grabbed his off the top and slipped them on before pulling the door open.

Outside it was just as miserably gray as it was the other day, except it wasn't raining. The sun was blocked out by dense clouds and shadows were cast over the atmosphere. The woeful front actually matched the feeling that this city was starting to give me. It was a hard place, full of hard people and mercy only met you by chance. Like in my case when a random stranger decided to put his own life on the line to save mine. I ached for home or anywhere where I didn't have to always watch my back. Somewhere that was warm and welcoming. Not this fucked up city with it's people equally fucked and uncaring.

"So whereabouts do you live Jimmy?" Matt asked as he shoved his hands inside his hoodie pockets. "You don't seem to know your way around this area very well."

I looked down at the ground, not wanting to have to reveal the truth about myself. It was shaming enough as it was and having to tell other people was even worse. My lips remained taut.

"Jimmy?" Matt urged.

"I uh... I don't really live around here." I said stupidly.

"Yeah well you made that obvious. So where do you live? Are you even from around?" He asked with his hazel eyes bright with curiosity.

"I don't live anywhere actually." I said lowly.

Matt stopped and me being klutzy and disoriented from the beating last night took another few steps before I realized he was behind me. I turned and looked at him questioningly.

"So you're homeless?" He asked, keeping the distance.

I twiddled my thumbs idly and didn't answer him. Instead I bit down on my lip and looked away. It was so embarrassing having to tell people I was homeless and drifted around the city aimlessly. People seemed to lose their respect when they found out I was living on the streets.

"No wonder you look so helpless and lost. I can't believe I didn't put it together sooner." Said Matt.

I wanted to quickly turn away and run so I didn't have to face him any longer. I could feel the scorn and the hate but when Matt walked by me and clapped me on the shoulder there was none left. I flinched and Matt started to laugh.

"Don't feel bad Jimmy. A lot of people don't have homes. Sometimes it just works out that way for them and there's nothing you can do." He said.

"Speak for yourself! You have no idea what it's like living and having no place to go and everyone that sees you wants you dead even if they don't know you. Just because you don't have money or barely anything!" I snapped.

Matt looked taken aback by my outburst, but instead of walking away like I'd anticipated, he began laughing again.

"What the fuck? Why are you laughing at me?" I asked, feeling the warmth of anger flare up inside my stomach.

"Because you're funny, that's why." He told me.

"There's nothing funny about me at all." I protested.

"Yes there is," Matt insisted. "Your hair is pretty funny and you're pretty fucking tall. That's funny."

"Well thanks for that, I didn't realize how funny looking I was until you came along." I spat.

"Hey! If it wasn't for me you'd be a pile of broken bones! So shut your skinny ass up and walk with me to get coffee!" He exclaimed, grabbing me and pulling me along by my elbow as he walked.

"I can walk just fine, thanks." I jerked my arm away.

I strolled alongside of Matt and occasionally looked at his face to see the way his lips pulled down naturally and his brows knit together like he was severely annoyed. He looked too angry for it to be a natural pout though. It looked like something inside of his head was really bugging him. Like he was getting angrier with each step we took.

"Why do you always look like that?" I asked him.

"What?" He inquired.

"Well you always have this look on your face like you want to punch someone out. Why?"

Matt shrugged his shoulders lamely. "Sometimes life can get you down."

I frowned. "Is something bugging you?"

"The world bugs me." He solemnly shook his head.

That was all I needed to hear to make me stop asking him questions. Instead of prying like I really wanted to, I followed him down the street before we cut through a parking lot and went into the same coffee shop I'd passed last night and saw the police cruiser. There were a few people in line near the counter so I busied myself with reading the plaques that hung up on the walls. The pungent aroma of brewing coffee made my empty stomach churn with hunger. I hadn't eaten in a whole day and was starting to get a headache from lack of nutrition. Luckily I still had a bit of money left, but I knew once I spent it on coffee and perhaps a muffin I would be out, with no conception of when I'd get more, if I ever did.

I wandered about the coffee shop and discovered a door leading into the washrooms. I decided to go in and wash up a bit just to make myself feel like I hadn't been sleeping in dirt. The bathroom mirror showed me for the first time my face during the aftermath of the attack. There was a cut near my eyebrow that was about an inch and a half in length and reached out to my temple. It was scabbed over and flaking with dry blood. My left eye was slightly swollen and dark and my lip was also cut on the right side. The part of me that hurt the most though were my ribs. Whenever I breathed in it felt like they were going to collapse into me and crush my organs. I unzipped my jacket with the clumping faux fur lining the hood and dropped it to the ground before lifting my t-shirt up. There were dark purple streaks and blotches marring my sides. I grimaced when I poked one of the tender contusions.

The door opened unexpectedly and I forgot to put my shirt down, as I was enveloped in looking at the purplish bruises that made my thin body look even more frangible and sickly. I let the material drop when I turned and saw Matt at the door with an amused look on his face.

"Are you ready to go? Or do you want to stay and look in the mirror some more?" He asked.

"I was just curious. Don't make me out to be conceited or some shit." I said as I followed him out of the bathroom and then out of the coffee shop.

"Oh here, this is for you." He said, handing me a brown paper bag with the coffee shop's logo on it.

I looked inside and saw a large croissant and a chocolate chip muffin and as grateful as I felt, I also got angry.

"You know, accepting charity only makes me feel worse." I told Matt as we walked down the sidewalk, now aimlessly as there wasn't another destination.

"I know what you mean," Said Matt, eying the bag he had just given me before snatching it up. "Fine, if you don't want it then I'll eat it."

Matt took the chocolate chip muffin out of the bag and smelled it with a plump smirk. "Mmm, I love muffins."

At that point my stomach began to growl and whir in hunger so loud that Matt heard it. He looked at my abdomen and then up at me before laughing and handing me the baked good. I scowled, half playfully half seriously, biting off half the top of the muffin. It's warm sweet chocolaty goodness almost made me shudder when I swallowed. It could have been the worst muffin in the world but right now it was the best thing I'd eaten in ages. The muffin was quick to be devoured and all that remained was the paper lining that I tossed on the ground.

"You're an animal." Matt commented before taking a sip of his coffee.

"You'd be an animal too if you were starving to death."

Matt looked away without response, casting his gaze onto the busy street packed with vehicles that struggled to move in gridlock. I couldn't understand why a man who appeared to be so withdrawn and distant from the world could have wanted to help somebody like me. Hell, he even looked like the type of guy that would beat me down in an alley and take my stuff. Instead he sheltered me and bought me food without prompting. My eyes were stuck on him, glistening with wonder. I longed to ask why he was showing so much hospitality towards a man he had never met before, but I figured it best to leave it alone. After all, at least he was helping me and that's all that mattered